Paradox

`We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.´
Viktor E. Frankl — “Man’s Search for Meaning”

`In oder to keep it, you have to give it away.´ Often heard in the 12-Step community, referring to the miracle of recovery.

`As long as we are trying to prove anything, we can never be free.´
Edith Eger — “The Choice”

While it is true that the spiritual path is open to everybody, not everybody follows the call. Some never even get to hear the call. This remains one of the great mysteries, to be simply accepted as a characteristic of the human condition.

Of those who do engage consciously in spiritual growth, most are propelled, initially at least, by suffering. I know of and have, indeed, met a few notable exceptions; people who grew up in families so steeped in spiritual truth and practice that they came to regard this to be the norm all their lives. I call them `sunshine children´. They are exceptional people, often dedicating their entire lives to bringing light into the world.

The rest of us, having, after childhood, embarked on a life of self-propulsion in the `pursuit of happiness´ inevitably get tripped up by the realities of life as we go along. By mid-life at the latest, — that moment when we reflect that we have probably already lived more than half of the days allocated to us, — we begin to experience the futility of running our lives on self will. Even those who appear to be succeeding, by societal standards, are often beset by doubts and fears, which further fuel their futile pursuits. The most ghastly behaviours, including those witnessed and so movingly documented by Viktor Frankl and Edith Eger, are always rooted in insecurity and fear.

Many of us crash. In some circles this is called `hitting rock bottom´. We are burned out and sore. The tank is empty, we lie in the rubble of our dreams and are, at best, perplexed and, at worst, angry, resentful, and bitter. If we are lucky, we find people who have already passed through this station, people who have discovered that embracing our human powerlessness is not the end of the game, but rather the beginning of new chapter in which we invite higher energies into our life to guide, nurish, and sustain us.

The paradox here is that these energies had always been available to us; we had simply been unable to see them because we had blocked the field of vision with all the busyness and trappings that adorn the `pursuit of happiness´. Our free will enables us to decline divine assistance, to `do everything ourselves´. Inherent in the human condition seems to be the pattern of needing to make `mistakes´ in order to learn. That same free will enables surrender. When, from the perspective of evolution of consciousness, we look back after having learned from them, we realise that the mistakes were not `mistakes´ as we had previously understood that term.

Next in line is the paradox that, by admitting and embracing my human powerlessness, I gain access to Power which can aid and assist me in living a good life in the face of my human powerlessness. If we have occasion to doubt the reality of this powerlessness, I suggest we sit in silence and meditate on the final moments in this incarnation, savouring each of our closing breaths until the breathing stops. This usually brings a new perspective to what, for many, had hitherto been a purely abstract concept.I have discovered that embracing my mortality has led to a significant increase in vitality in each new day. Paradox again. Instead of reacting to the reality of my mortality by (figuratively) sticking my head in the sand, I now respond with acceptance and walk tall through each new day, vibrating at ever higher frequencies, noticing and tuning into new levels of detail to which I had previously been blind.

Here it is important to note that the realisation of human powerlessness should not be used as an excuse for passivity. That would be going down one of the many diversionary rabbit holes strewn along the path of spiritual development. What is required is the recognition that while I have no final say over outcomes, I am still responsible for giving my best in terms of input. I have to do my footwork. I throw my pebbles into the pond and work with the ripples returned by the Universe.

The rational mind — reason, is the domain of the ego. Paradox resides outside this space. This is why we have such difficulties in `getting our minds around´ them. What I have experienced is that it is sufficient to get my heart around them, or rather, open my heart to them. This requires courage. Reason is only a subset of the intelligence available to us. Unfortunately, after childhood, presupposing an orderly indoctrination into the collective madness we call `society´, it often appears to us as the only legitimate field of intelligence. The motto runs: `If it can’t be counted, it doesn’t count!´

Pain, unlike suffering, in inherent to life. Suffering is voluntary, though we only get to see this after the fact, when we finally get sick and tired of being sick and tired. We may subsequently be induced to break out of our old thinking and discover entirely new vistas beyond the pale. Ego, threatened by any potential elevation of consciousness and thus intent on keeping us in her `home territory´ will try anything and everything to prevent us from discovering what is beyond the garden walls of reason. When we do venture outside, we discover new possibilities such as intuition, contemplation and meditation.

Meditation is the daily training for and practice of dying. For twenty or fourty or one hundered and twenty minutes each morning I die to the illusions of this incarnation. This keeps the Presence of those Higher Frequencies, the Great Spirit, vibrant throughout the day. It is the restorative response to the day-by-day spiritual depletion which is as natural a consequence of living, as fatigue is on the physical plane. Just as rest benefits the body, meditation restores the mind and soul. My spiritual fitness of any day last week is of no good to me today. I need that `reset´ every day. And I cannot provide warmth to others if my own stove has gone cold.

This brings us to the final paradox: “In order to keep it, I have to give it away”.

A life without service can perhaps be full, but never fulfilling. When our journey takes us to this point where we begin to `pay things forward´, i.e. to pass on that which has been given us so freely, we gain entry to an even richer dimension of living. The endless internal confusion and wrangling about our life purpose evaporate like the sweet dew on a sunny morning, no longer relevant, because we know we are now living that purpose for which we have been sent.

Viktor Frankl would say we have now given our life its purpose.

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